Family History in a Box

Since the insanity hit fever pitch I've been tossed into the frey of cleaning out my home. Forced to segregate everything my mother and I owned into one of three categories, I am forever making little decisions and seemingly forever avoiding the big ones. The three categories are as follows: 1) Stuff I Want To Keep, 2) Stuff I Don't Want To Keep, and 3) Stuff I Want To Keep But Can't.

Among the stuff ensnared in category one I have compiled a full 2 boxes worth of various writings, letters, notes, poems, songs, articles, cards, invitations, announcements, and other items involving ink and paper, that have been exchanged over the years between the most important people in my life. Love notes from my father to my mother. Love notes from my grandfather to my grandmother. Articles sent from my grandmother to my father about various things of mutual interest. Poems written by my mother to my father. Poems written by my grandfather to my mother. Letters from my uncle to my mother regarding his college applications. Letters from some guy my mom went to college with who then moved to Paris and continued sending her notes that appear to be harmless but infer some sort of relationship may have taken place.

The most interesting of my discoveries comes in the form of The Nothing Book. The Nothing Book started out once upon a time as just that... a book with nothing in it. The cover of the book asks a simple question, "Wanna make something of it?" Scrawled on my Nothing Book's pages are a chronicle of the first months of my parent's relationship, pre-marriage. Upon its pages I have found notes to one another following momentous occasions such as the first dinner meeting of my mother and her future mother in-law or perhaps more daunting at the time, the evenings on which my mother was introduced to each of my father's children. Between its covers, The Nothing Book hold an extraordinary insight to the love my parents held for one another and furthermore, a roadmap for the early stages of their life-journey together.

Perhaps everyone has one of these. I do not know. I hope not. For the moment it makes me feel as if my parents have left me with something positive. Something I don't have to make a decision about. Something no one could not keep.

info overload

Talk about time gone by...

As it stood last time we spoke my mother had been diagnosed with ovarian cancer, had undergone her first chemotherapy treatment and was optimistically on the road to recovery. Unfortunately, the road to recovery was under construction and we got lost on the detour.

On May 24th, 2006, Thea Klein, my mother, died from complications due to ovarian cancer. Complications implies that it wasn't actually the cancer that killed her, but all of the lousy symptoms and ancillary diseases and whatnot that did her in. From the beginning people have asked, "Lung cancer?" when I have failed to state its ovarian nature up front. To these people with a gift of intuition, rest assured, emphysema was ovarian cancer's accomplice. In short, following her first chemotherapy treatment, mom's immune system shut down and welcomed with open arms, every possible infection it could.

Sure there are gory details. Sure there are heartbreaking moments. Sure, there are even devastating recollections from these few weeks of my life. The last few weeks of hers. I find them unneccessary to share, and moreover I find myself not wanting to share them.

As blogs seem to be for updating a faceless public with pointless information about oneself and oneself's schedule, activities and future plans, here are mine to date:
I am liquidating almost all that I own. Some out of desire but mostly out of neccessity. A 23 yr old who graduated with a degree in film is in no position to make a mortgage payment and furthermore has no ability to house and store everything his parents and their parents aquired from birth.
I obtained a temporary position with a large corporation (actually a small contractor at a large corporation) and have been working at UBS for almost 6 weeks. I do not love it, nor do I love when people ask if I love it. It will do for now. I work with nice people in a tolerable environment. (I am also compensated handsomely.)
I bought myself a present. I am the proud owner of a brand new Scion tC automobile. I deserve it.
I fully intend to sell my mother's condo by October and am currently planning on moving to Los Angeles to pursue an actual career.
These are my immediate plans and activities. I'm not sure what it accomplishes by posting them on the internet, but there they are.
Also, worth mentioning, since my last post, Israel has become involved in a war on two fronts, one with Hamas in the Gaza strip and the other with Hezbollah in southern Lebanon. Both began following unprovoked kidnappings of IDF soldiers. In a few short weeks Israelis have once again been backed into their bomb shelters with unprecedented attacks reaching farther into Israel than previously thought possible. Our friends are in shelters. The college campus we stayed on has been hit by several missles and students we worked with have been quoted by international news agencies. Gillian and I have been incredibly sad lately, and furthermore, I have almost felt guily for not being there to experience it with them. It must sound nuts, but it is how I feel. If nothing else, I hope you stay glued to the news and follow the story. Ignorance is inexcusable.
As I am quite busy these days, packing, sorting, dumping, working, nervously rocking in corners while sucking my thumb, etc. updating my blog is not of the utmost importance. I do hope you understand. I will try to return to it when things settle down. If they settle down.
Take care.